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Question about assembly(MAKE.s)

This is just a project I am doing in the meantime whilst making an OS.

Is the MAKE.s assembly file correct logically speaking..or would it be prone to errors system wise..

I am learning assembly for the OS me and a few buddies are trying to make, and I am trying to understand it.

Comment below if you see anything that would either not work or be prone to errors(p.s: I don't care if you're a master at assembly or read a little over it, I just need feedback)